Tuesday, 6 August 2013
Reminiscence the feeling...
Today. I saw him today. My eyes. My
eyes lingered carefully on the contours of his face. My mind. My mind told me
to look away. My Heart. My heart wouldn't let me and I turned to look at him
again. After all this time, here, at the place I saw him for the very first
time. I did not know if it was a mere coincidence, or just fate begging me to
give him another chance. And in all honesty, I did not care.
Because
today, from the very moment I saw those eyes, I rose in remembrance. No visions
of the bad memories flashed before my eyes. It was beauty, it was peace. Today,
after three years and a half, he still looked like the boy whose smile once
took my breath away. The boy who sat next to me in class, who whispered sweet
nothings in my ear. The boy who would hold my hand through boring lectures and
hug me tight before he dropped me off home. The boy whose eyes sparkled with
innocence, the boy, my boy, who could never do any wrong.
It all
came back to me, a rush I hadn't felt since the last time my lips touched his.
The security his arms would give me, the joy I’d feel when he said something
stupid just to cheer me up. Those endless conversations, hiding beneath my
blanket just to talk to him for those extra minutes post-midnight. The way he’d
say my name and make it sound like the most beautiful thing in the world. I
remember the way his nose would turn red every time I told him I loved him. How
he was everything, every minute of my every day.
And
then one day, it all changed. He unleashed a monster, who had forgotten how to
touch his woman with love. Whose mouth knew only swear words, loving arms that
now became a prison I’d struggle to get out of. It all came back. The memories.
And the bad, like a tsunami, washed away the good.
Today.
I saw him today. And even when my eyes couldn't look away, and my heart couldn't walk
away, I did. Because I was stronger. Because he made me stronger.
He made a woman out of a silly naive girl. And despite all his faults,
he loved me,
once. Goodbyes were due. I picked up pace, walked away smiling, and did
not
turn around. What was gone, was gone. Never forgotten, but now a
peaceful memory. The curtains were off and the truth was bare-naked.
There was
closure in remembrance.
